Hmm a few ways but depends how your game works, it gets a little tricky.
When you spawn the sprite on the family, you can relate them to each other by for example setting an instance variable on the sprite to the family object UID, or you could have a family instance variable on the family object, and when you create the sprite, set a variable on the sprite to the same value, so family.var is 5 and sprite.var is 5 for example and they are related.
Then when the sprite is destroyed, you find the family object that has the same var value, and you set the family object picked variable (from the other comment 0 to 1) back to 0 (unpicked).
Another way is for example if the sprite always overlaps the family object, you could say on destroyed pick family object that is overlapping sprite and set the variable back to 0 (unpicked). This only works if that is true though about the overlapping.
In general, you just make the sprite created relate to the family object in some way, usually with variables.